


His Endearing Ways

by keejay



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Anxiety, Bella Swan Has a Twin, Bisexual Male Character, Bullying, Consensual Underage Sex, Depression, Developing Relationship, Eating Disorders, F/F, F/M, Gay Male Character, Homophobia, M/M, Multi, Nonbinary Character, Other, Self-Harm, Sibling Rivalry, Trans Male Character, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, japanese alice cullen, korean emmett cullen, mixed race jasper hale, mixed race rosalie hale, ocd jasper hale, union jasper hale
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-09-17 21:12:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16981884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keejay/pseuds/keejay
Summary: Brandon Swan was always attracted to the odd and horrendous. So, when his mom kicks him out and he moves in with his old man, Charlie, he meets the exact definition of that: Edward Cullen. What will happen when he goes deeper into the secrets of the small town of Forks, Washington, and discovers an attraction on the way there?





	1. Take a Chance

_Brandon Swan's POV:_

_I'd never given much thought to how I would die. I mean, I'd never given much of a thought to anything really. Before this, I was just a normal guy with anxiety problems, barely any friends, and a love for mysteries. Dying wasn't in the job description for me with such a monotonous life. But now, standing in front of this bloodthirsty creature wanting to kill me, I could say that I would never have thought to die like this. Maybe in a car crash or drowning in my best friend's swimming pool._

_But definitely not by being drained dry by some nomad tracking vampire intent on fucking with my family._

_With onyx eyes, he stared down at me cockily, and I felt my temper start to rise. Just because I was a defenseless human did not give him the right to terrorize me! Had he never heard of vampires dating humans before? It happened quite a lot, honestly. Even Aro, a Volturi leader, had changed his human mate. And this guy had been alive once too._

_Although, he probably wasn't much of a model citizen while he was breathing, anyway._

_Without thinking, I screeched. "No! I am not dying tonight, fucker! Over my dead body." I could feel my palms getting sweaty and I could barely hear as my heartbeat rattled through my brain._

_Hah, if you say so." All at once he launched himself at me, pushing my lanky body to the ground. As my head slammed against the dance floor, I felt something crack. With foggy vision, I watched him bite into the meat of my wrist before disappearing._

_Fire engulfed my entire body._

_Someone screamed. Was that me? I couldn't be sure. My vision started to get hazy as the pain grew too great, and I gagged and dry heaved. The room was spinning so fast._

_Brandon, Brandon. Stay with me, I've got you." Edward, what was he doing here? Where was he? My throat felt raw as I breathed in and out slowly. He continued to murmur quiet words, but I couldn't make any sense of them._

_Another bite to my wrist, and it felt like the fire was being sucked out of me. As time passed my eyes rolled into the back of my head and the world grew dim._

_All at once, everything turned black._

I shot up in bed, bed clothes drenched in sweat and my heart pounding rapidly against my rib cage. There it was again, another nightmare. And this time another clue.

Edward. The same Edward that was my biology partner and currently hated my guts.

With a sigh, I dragged myself out of bed and made my way into the bathroom before hopping into the shower and cleaning the aches and pains out of my body. I had only been here for three weeks, three very long weeks, but in that short amount of time, I had not only pissed off Edward, but also Mike Newton and his followers. They all craved the sexy Lauren Mallory and cute as a button Jessica Stanley, who ruthlessly threw themselves at me, even though I told them all I wasn't interested. I may be into girls, but I was definitely into boys more. The only ones that had believed me were Angela, Eric, and Ben, all of which had become my close friends.

I was probably the only one out and proud at Forks High anyway, which was a shame. Dating was going to be a drag if I had to go all the way to Seattle for a cute boy.

After my shower, I dressed quickly in a pair of dark jeans, a black t-shirt paired with a red flannel, and my black Chuck Taylor's. Dad was already gone by the time I went downstairs, smelling of deodorant and cologne, and I quickly scarfed down a bowl of cocoa pebbles before quickly brushing my teeth and leaving with my bag over my shoulder.

It was another rainy day in Forks, and the earth smelt clean and fresh. The rusty orange truck grumbled down the wet roads, and I hummed happily to myself. I wasn't usually a morning person, but today seemed like it could be turning up. Maybe the girls would stop bothering me, and maybe the guys would stop death glaring at me. Maybe Edward would actually like me.

But as I parked into my usual spot and slid out of my truck, I knew it was all for naught. The guys stood protectively by the girls, who drooled in my direction and threw me grumpy looks. The happiness I felt quickly faded, and my shoulders slumped. Too good to be true, I guess.

"Hey B," Angela exclaimed as she and Ben walked up, a weird tension surrounding them. Eric and I had an ongoing bet on who would ask who out first. My bet was on Angela.

"Hey, Angela. You ready for the test?"

"What test?" Ben screeched.

"The one in Bio."

"It's over all the Phylum, right?"

"Yeah, the Phylum one, Ben."

"Phew! This one's in the bag," We made our way into school, joined quickly by Eric. It was easy to forget how weird my dream was and how disappointing this morning was when talking to good friends.

Well, it was easy until _he_ walked in.

With his adopted sister, Alice, by his side, they glided through the hallway to their lockers looking like movie stars. My cheeks turned pink and my mouth became dry like cotton.

"Hey, you've got some drool," Angela exclaimed, and I instinctively went to wipe my mouth before I caught her sly grin. In retort, I stuck my tongue out at her before leaving the group as my locker came into view. Right next to the boy's bathroom and always smelling of whatever nastiness came out of there.

After depositing my bag inside I grabbed my English textbook, a pencil, and my notebook before closing it again. Eric met up with me again and walked to Mr. Mason's classroom.

"Today, class, we'll be getting into partners and discussing what we read yesterday." Eric and I shared a look from across the room as others around us groaned. Mister Mason droned on. "After you discuss I want you to answer the seven questions on the board on one sheet of paper. Write both of your names on it. Once you are finished turn it into the turn homework tray and sit quietly."

As the girl at the desk beside me moved, Eric slid in and sent me a cheeky grin.

"So, you still infatuated with Cullen?"

"I-I don't know what you're talking about."

"Cut the crap, dude. Your face is an open book." Blushing, I ignored him and opened my notebook and wrote both of our names down. Eric decides to change the subject and get to the task at hand. "So, what do you think are the major influences in Jane's life?"

"Probably her nasty family and her best friend. She's had a hard life."

"True, true. I don't understand how people can treat a child so cruelly, you know?"

"She didn't ask to be born. All she wants is love." We discussed and answered the rest of the questions in record time. After Eric turned in our paper he sat back down beside me and grinned again. My heart rate picked up at his expression. Oh, what now?

"You know…I heard he's been asking about you." Edward's been asking about me?

"Who?"

"Mike, obviously. No, Edward! Duh!"

"I think you're mistaken…"

"How so?"

"Why would he be asking about _me_ of all people?" Eric's face softened. Leaning over, he patted my back sympathetically as my cheeks reddened again.

"Maybe he's finally noticed how awesome you are."

"I guess that could be it. I am pretty awesome."

"That's the spirit! Now, what's the plan?" The bell rang, and the class started to file out. As we exited the room I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Plan?"

"Well, yeah!" When I kept staring at him he sighed and rolled his eyes. "You know, the plan to get Cullen to fall for you."

"What!" I sputtered. "I don't know…"

"Please, come on. He's interested, I just know it!"

"Okay, fine. You do what you want, even though I know for a fact that he isn't interested."

As usual, Eric walked me to Government in building six. Thankfully, the rain had let up for a while and I made it to my class without my jacket that I had left in my locker. Saying goodbye to Eric, I entered the room and kept my mouth shut for the rest of the class. I shared it with Mike and Tyler, who both glared at me as soon as I entered.

Trigonometry and Spanish were no better. Jessica sat next to me and talked my head off. That wouldn't be a problem if it was a normal conversation, but she kept bringing up my sexuality.

"So, you _really_ like guys?" Jessica leaned in to ask in Spanish as Mrs. Goff handed out packets, a confused expression on her face. _Please, I don't want to have this conversation again_.

"Yes."

"More than girls?" _Yes!_ I wanted to shout.

But instead, I took in a deep breath before answering calmly, "Girls are nice, but I'd like a boy instead."

"But, why?"

"Why do you like boys?

Suddenly she donned a dreamy expression and wistful smile, "Well, they're cute and sweet and can take care of me-"

"I feel the same way. Now please, let me get back to my assignment." I said sharply before turning back to my assignment. I wasn't bothered for the rest of class and once the bell rang I quickly deposited my things in my locker before heading to the cafeteria.

I paid for an apple and a bottle of water before sitting down between Ben and Angela, who gave each other soft looks over my head. It made my chest ache out of loneliness, but I ignored it and munched on my food. The table quickly filled up and I tensed as Lauren sat down in front of me.

"Hey, Brandon," She purred, flipping her corn silk hair back.

"Hey, Lauren."

"How are you?"

"I'm okay, and you?"

"I'm great! And looking for a date to the dance."

"Are you?"

"Wait, I have a great idea! Why don't we go together?"

"I'm busy. Visiting my family in Florida." She looked momentarily stunned but brushed it off and smiled.

"Maybe next time then." "Yeah, maybe," I bit into my apple and chewed thoroughly, hoping my anxiety would dissipate. Thankfully, she turned to Mike and started talking to him, and I finally relaxed. Well, I did until I felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked up from my tray and saw that my lunch table had fallen silent.

Who was behind me?

Slowly, I turned and was met face to face with none other than Edward Cullen, a shy smile on his face and red hair a sexy mess on his head.

"You're Brandon?"

"Y-yes," I choked out, hand clutching the shiny red apple tightly. Hopefully, I didn't crush it.

Edward chuckled and asked, "Do you want to hang out after school today?" My eyebrows shot to my hairline and my jaw dropped. Is this real life? Was he for real?

"S-sure," My voice cracked. I coughed before continuing. "That sounds cool."

"Your house or mine?"

"Mine's fine."

"Cool, I'll meet you by your truck," He turned to go, and I thought the conversation, but suddenly he turned back around. With a soft touch, his thumb swiped over my lip before sucking on the appendage. Edward winked before exclaiming, "You had something on your face. I got it."

"Th-thanks," I licked my lips absentmindedly and then he walked away again. My face flushed as I watched him sit down at his own lunch table.

Was this real life? Did that really just happen? I brushed my lips with my fingertips and sucked in a breath.

Wow, wow, wow.

"I told you he liked you!" Eric whispered.

"Shit, wow. That actually happened."

"All of the girls like you and now Cullen likes you? Damn, what's your secret?" Mike questioned bitterly before standing up and leaving the table. Jessica followed quickly after him, chattering his ear off.

"He licked his damn thumb after wiping your lip. He literally indirectly kissed you."

"Shit."

"So, what's the plan, now?"

"Again, with the plan? Dude, I think you're mistaken."

"Excuse me? He indirectly kissed you and you're still on that bullshit?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"You're hopeless! But don't worry, Yorkie is still here to help you."

"I hate when you talk about yourself in the third person," He sent me an impish grin and I groaned.

The bell rang, and we returned to our classes, but still, my mind was a mess. Could he like me of all people? The random bi kid that had been pining for him for weeks?

No, he couldn't. That's impossible. Even if he liked boys, why would he choose me of all people?

Yeah, he's probably just being nice. Just wants to be friends. But what was with that indirect kiss?

I was still deep in my thoughts as I slid onto the stool in Biology. Edward sat beside me, a crooked grin on his face.

"We meet again," He exclaimed, and I flushed.

"Heh, yeah. We do have class together." The bell rang again, and Mr. Banner started to talk about the lesson. I was only half listening, though.

"How are you liking Forks?"

"It's good. Unlike my sister and mother, I love the rain. Calms me."

"I feel similarly. You have a sister? Does she go here?"

"Oh, no. Bella lives with our mom and step-dad. I'm only here because I was at the wrong place at the wrong time."

"I do not mean to pry, but could you explain?"

"I had a friend and he wasn't… a great influence on me. He had a good heart, but his choices were rather horrible. One night we were out getting high and then the cops showed up. He slipped the weed in my pocket, so I would get in trouble for it," My face flushed again. "After that, my mom kicked me out and I've been here ever since."

"I'm sorry that happened to you."

"Don't be, I should have been more careful and chose my friends more wisely."

"Your friend should have been a better friend to you, in my opinion," Another smile graced Edward's beautiful face and then he did something I would have never expected. His hand landed on my thigh and caressed it.

I couldn't help gulping, my eyes not leaving the sight. His fingers were long like a pianist and his nails were neat and clipped. Turning to look at him, I noticed that he was already reading out of the textbook again. When he rubbed my thigh again I felt myself melt a little.

This can't be real… can it? Am I dreaming? What the hell?

Sucking in a deep breath, I decided to ignore it and get along with my studies. After that, we completed a worksheet. Edward's hand never left my thigh even as he finished his work.

When the bell rang he finally removed it and glanced at me with dark eyes.

"You know, I didn't ask you to hang out because I want to be friends."

"Oh?"

"I like you, Brandon Swan. More than I probably should. More than I'm allowed to."

"I-I like you too."

"Good, it's settled then.

"Wait, what's settled?"

"This will be our first date. Low-key as they say these days, correct?"

"Yeah, yeah. Low-key," Without warning, he kissed the corner of my mouth before gathering his things.

"See you after school, Brandon," Edward exclaimed before heading out of the classroom. I waved at his retreating frame, feeling dazed.

"See you…"

* * *

 

"He kissed you! Holy shit, I knew it!" Eric cackled loudly, causing others to turn and stare. "Yorkie has done it again!"

"Will you keep your voice down?"

"Let me enjoy this. Ooh, being right feels so damn good."

"You're so embarrassing," I said with a sigh, shaking my head. But I couldn't keep the small smile from gracing my face.

"You love me, though."

"So… do I just meet him by my truck? Or do I go look for him?"

"Looks like he's already made that decision for you, bud." I turned from Eric to look glance at my parked truck. Edward leaned against it, playing on his phone.

"Maybe I should run."

"What? Why would you do that?"

"I don't know, I just feel like throwing up."

"Those are just butterflies."

"Damn big butterflies," Eric laughed before pushing me towards my truck. Towards Edward Cullen.

"Go on, you dramatic goofball. Go get your man," I glanced back and gave him a small smile, which he gave a thumbs up in return. As I walked over to the truck I felt like I was going to shit my heart out.

He was just so damn beautiful. His messy red hair, his jawline, his lanky arms. The way he laughed.

"Hey," Edward exclaimed as he pocketed his phone.

"Hello, Edward. Fine afternoon we're having."

"Shall we?" I nodded. "After you."

The ride to the Swan residence was filled with a loud silence and his hand again rubbing my thigh as I drove. I almost hit two light poles and one parked car, but we finally made it with minimal difficulty.

When he removed his hand, I felt like I could breathe again. I quickly unlocked the front door and we slipped inside. Dad was still at work, so we had the house to ourselves.

"Would you like a snack? We have some Cheeze-it's."

"No thank you, I had a big lunch."

A big lunch? An untouched salad is a big lunch? As much as I wanted to argue, I held it in and nodded. Maybe he was insecure about eating or was dealing with weight issues. He was skinny enough.

"We could work on homework," Edward slid into a chair and a small graced his face. "Or we could watch a movie."

"How about you come here." Hesitantly, I stepped towards him. When I stood in front of him his hands slid around my thighs and pulled me closer. Then his hands rested on my hips. My cheeks flushed, and I swallowed. "Is this okay?"

"Y-yeah."

"You are comfortable with this?"

"Mhm, completely."

"You seem nervous."

"Mhm, completely." His mouth morphed into a crooked grin that had me swooning.

"You're something else, you know that?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty weird."

"That isn't a bad thing. The best of us are."

"Thank you, Lewis Carroll." As the words left my lips he pulled me into his lap. As in like, all the way onto his lap.

I was sitting on Edward Cullen. What the hell?

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"I thought you hated me."

"I did...but-" The butterflies were back but this time they were massive, the size of golf balls bouncing around my stomach. Was I going to throw up while sitting in his lap? On his nice button up? The horror. "I started watching you. And I sort of maybe… fell for you." Edward seemed as if he was choosing his words carefully.

"Me?"

"Yes. And I'd like to take you out on a proper date when this is over if you'd be willing."

"I'll have to think about it," I teased but started giggling when his smile dropped. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding! I'd love to go out on a proper date with you, Mr. Cullen."

You'd think it would be all chocolates and roses after that, right? No, not even close.

_Not even close at all._


	2. Figuring Things Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> brandon and edward decide to date. and it comes with complications.

A proper first date. With Edward Cullen.

I was going to fuck this up so bad.

We sat in the movie theater in Seattle, my hand shoved into a bucket of popcorn as I munched anxiously.

When did I start eating, when should I stop? Everything seemed to blur together in my mind until Edward put a hand on my wrist.

"You are going to get a stomach ache if you keep eating so fast."

"I'm sorry," I swallowed before pulling my hand from the buttery popcorn. Taking a napkin from his hand, I slowly wiped my hands and mouth clean. By now I was probably a quarter popcorn. "I'm kind of nervous."

"I can tell." Edward's smile sent my heart in palpitations, or at least that's what if felt like. He leaned towards my face and kissed my cheek lightly. Immediately I turned red. "I'm nervous too."

"You're nervous?"

"I'm on my first date with my crush. Why wouldn't I?"

Fuck, this isn't real. This can't be real.

"We'll get through this together." He whispered before intertwining our hands.

Shit, I was having a heart attack. When did it get so hot in here?

The rest of the movie was spent half paying attention and half marveling at the feel of his cold hand. Wow, wow, wow. This was unreal.

I didn't even notice the movie had ended until Edward let go of my hand to nudge me back to reality.

"Want to go back to your house?"

"S-sure," I gulped, and he smiled crookedly before leading me out of the theater. With my popcorn thrown away, I had nothing to do but fiddle with my fingers as we drove back to mine. I let Edward drive as I was too anxious to drive myself.

When we pulled up thankfully dad was still at work. I let us back in and slumped onto the couch.

"You know, you are very cute, Brandon."

"You can't possibly mean that."

"Why would I lie to you?"

"This has to be some elaborate prank. I swear. Why would someone like you date someone like me? Shit, this is making my head hurt."

"Well, why would someone like you date someone like me?"

"Is that a trick question?"

"I am a person, not an expensive painting or celebrity. I have feelings just as much as you. I crush on cute boys in my class and I get nervous on first dates and I also have bad anxiety. Just because people find me attractive," He held up his fingers to make air quotes around the word. "does not mean I am not a person."

"You're right."

"You never answer my question, though…" When I raised an eyebrow at him he bit his lip and glanced at me nervously. "Why do you like me, Brandon?"

"You're attractive, of course. Someone would have to be blind to see that. But also…" I felt my stomach knot as I tried to form the words. "I like your handwriting and how you take neat notes. And all your freckles that look like constellations that I want to trace. And how your hair always looks like you just woke up but in a good way. And how sure of yourself you seem to be walking down the halls with your siblings even with all the rumors surrounding your family."

"So, you admit I am attractive?"

"Is that all you got out of that?" I pushed his shoulder and he laughed loudly. "But yeah, I do. And not just physically." Feeling confident, I lean up and stare straight into his golden-brown eyes before asking, "Now, why do you like me?"

"You're nice." He said simply, and my smile starts to drop.

"That's it?"

"Shall I elaborate?"

"Please?"

"I see you with your friends and you always have something nice to say or you are holding the door open for a teacher or helping another classmate study for a test. I even saw you compliment the lunch lady on her nail polish."

"It was new and Gladess looked lovely!"

"See? You are a nice person. And you are also very cute if I'm being honest." Edward leans in and presses a kiss to my lips. I probably should be thinking about how cold he is but my brain has basically turned to mush and all I seem to know how to do is kiss him back.

So, I do.

And that is where my father finds us when he comes home.

A cough causes us to break apart. My face turns beet red while Edward's pales even more.

"So, who is this?"

"Edward Cullen, sir." Edward stands stiffly to his feet and puts his hand out. I cringe when dad just looks at it but rejects the handshake.

"Doctor Cullen's your dad?"

"Yes, sir."

"He probably wants you home, don't you think?"

"Yes, I'll be going, sir." Edward turns to me and with an anxious look and I wave stupidly. He grabs his backpack and leaves without another word.

"Wait! He doesn't have a way home."

"He could call his father."

"I can just drive him to go pick up his car. Right?

"It's late, Brandon."

"Come on, dad. I have that pepper spray you gave me and the taser in my glove box. Nothing will happen. Please?"

"Fine. But you come straight home, you hear me? No more funny business."

"Of course, serious is my middle name. No funny business here."

* * *

 

I was a damn liar, is what I was. And I had Edward pinned to the side of my truck as I shoved my tongue down his throat. Yes, I was weak, and my middle name was funny business. But what can I say? I hadn't kissed anyone in months and it felt so good.

"You need to get home, Brandon," Edward whispered as we broke apart, his hands trembling. "I do not want your father to hate me even more."

"He doesn't hate you. He's just protective."

"Which means you should get home."

"One more kiss?"

"Ugh, I can't say no to that pout."

One more kiss turned into two, then three. By the time I was driving home it had been ten more minutes and I knew I would get an earful from Charlie. But I couldn't bring myself to care.

Edward freaking Cullen was my something. We had made out and held hands and gone on a cute ass date and it felt almost perfect.

But perfect things had a habit of showing their true colors.

* * *

 

That night, after a long and awkward talk with dad about safe sex and what he was to me, I was left to finish my homework and head to bed. After sending a few texts back and forth with Eric and Angela, I put my phone down and put my head under the covers.

As night drew in the sinking feeling of something going wrong also came. This had all happened so fast and so out of nowhere. Was this real? Did he actually like me? Or was this a prank and tomorrow he and his family would be laughing at me?

No, I shouldn't think like that. _Be positive_ , I thought to myself. _Don't let your head tell you lies_.

It took a half an hour to calm my thoughts enough to fall asleep, but still, I dreamt of him. And almost dying. Again, and again, and again.

* * *

 

"That Edwin boy is outside waiting on you," Dad said in annoyance and I choked on my cereal. I coughed and swallowed roughly before standing up and heading for the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and gave myself a good look.

"Don't fuck this up, Brandon," I said to myself before spitting out the toothpaste and washing out my mouth. Then I grabbed a sweatshirt and my bag before heading outside with a goodbye to my father.

He was leaning against his Volvo with that sexy crooked grin on his face and I suddenly had the strong urge to book it and run back in the house. But I held it off and walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his waist.

And then we were kissing again, and it all felt weirdly easy and not at all awkward and I had the sudden urge to pinch myself to make sure this was real.

Pulling away, Edward whispered against my mouth, "Good morning, my love."

"Your love? I like that a lot."

"You sure you like it? I can call you baby or sweetheart if that would be better-"

"Call me all of those, actually. I love pet names."

"Good to know." He kissed me again and I sighed happily against his mouth. When Edward pulled away again, he said, "Let's get to school."

"Let's go."

My nerves started to go haywire as we neared Forks High. I was already out and proud, but was Edward ready to be? When we were parked in the school parking lot, I stopped him from opening his door.

"Can we talk for a second?"

"Of course. What would you like to talk about?"

"What are we?"

"Aren't we boyfriends?"

"You never made it official…"

"Would you like to be my boyfriend?"

"Yes, I would. Thank you for asking."

"You're welcome." He smiled, and I returned it. "Is that all you would like to talk about?"

"No, actually. Um, are you okay with coming out? I mean, we're two guys and we might get a lot of shit for it… And I don't know what your sexuality or if you like labels, but I want you to know that we can keep it just between us, okay? I am not forcing you to come out."

"Brandon, I am perfectly fine with being out of the closet. I have come to terms with it and my family already knows." Edward kisses me, and I feel my anxiety start to disappear. "I am a gay man and I have a wonderful boyfriend and I am ready to show the world. Are you ready?"

"Heck yes, I am."

And that is how I found myself the school's hot point of gossip as we walked through the parking lot hand in hand. There were the usual glances of disgust but surprisingly a lot more people just looked surprised.

"Are you okay?" Edward whispered, a worried look in his eyes. I nodded and smiled at him.

We made it into the school without mishaps and Edward stood next to me as I put my bag into my locker and grabbed my textbook, notebook, and pencil.

"You don't have to walk me to class, you know."

"I know, but I will. Because I want to."

"As long as you want to."

When we came to my classroom, he pressed a kiss to my lips before leaving to his class. I was in a daze as I sat at my desk, only blinking back to reality when Eric snapped his fingers at my face.

"So, is it true? You and Cullen are official?" Eric looked at me with wide eyes. I covered my face and giggled before nodding. "YES! Yorkie is right, yet again!"

"Yes, you were right."

"So, how did it happen?"

"We went on that date I told you about and then we went back to my house and talked and made out before my dad caught us. And then he asked me officially this morning."

"Wow, this is insane. Like insane."

"I know! Fuck, I can't believe it's real."

"Well believe it, bitch! You've got a hot boyfriend and there's nothing you can do about it!" As the words left his lips I giggled again. The bell rang, and the rest of the class filtered in before the lesson started.

* * *

 

It was before lunch when they cornered me. Rough hands pushed me into the bathroom and slammed me into the wall.

It all happened so fast I couldn't fight back. Freezing in fear, I lurched as a fist hit my stomach.

"Who knew the Chief's son was a faggot?"

"Yeah, I thought they were just rumors. But nah, we've got this disgusting freak in our school."

It was like I was back in Arizona again and getting the piss beat out of me after gym class.

A disgusting freak, a faggot, a sinner. I had heard it all but that didn't mean I was numb to the painful words thrown at me.

Someone punched me in the face and busted my lip. Another punched me in the stomach again.

When I was gasping for breath on my knees they finally relented and left. As their laughter left the bathroom, I decided the best course of action was to pretend it never happened.

My therapist probably would disagree with the point of action, but she wasn't here. So, I would just push it away and go on as if it never happened.

Pulling myself off the ground, I wiped the spit off my face with a paper towel and dabbed at the blood on my lip. When I was sure the blood had stopped, I pulled a band aid out of my bag and covered it best I could before grabbing my bag and leaving the bathroom.

Lunch was halfway over when I entered the cafeteria, but I wasn't hungry anyway. I sat down next to Eric and took in a deep breath.

"Oh my gosh, what happened?" Lauren asked as our eyes met and I shrugged.

"Nothing happened."

Tyler's expression turned angry. "Did someone hurt you?"

"Just leave it alone, okay?"

"But if someone hurt you, they need to get in trouble-" Jessica's words cut off as someone sat in the seat next to me. I knew who it was before I even looked up.

"Brandon," Edward exclaimed in a weird tone of voice. "Who did this?"

"No one."

"How could no one do this?"

"It's nothing, okay? Just leave it alone."

"I certainly won't leave it alone." Ignoring him, I stood up and left the table. But Edward was right behind me. When we entered the hallway, he kept in time with my strides.

"Brandon, we need to tell the principle about this-"

"And what? They get suspended for a few days? When they come back, I'll get worse treatment. Believe me, I know." My body felt hot and uncomfortable and I just wanted to breathe. "Could you please just go? I'll talk to you in class."

"I'm not leaving you when you're like this."

"Please, I need some space to breathe for a second. Can you do that for me?"

"Are you sure you will be alright in my absence?"

"Yes, I will be." Nodding, Edward kissed me before stepping away.

"Okay, I will see you in class, then."

"See you."

When he disappeared back in the cafeteria, I felt my composure break. Tears leaked from my eyes, but I quickly wiped them away and headed to class early. Mr. Banner sat watching an episode of Bill Nye and waved me inside without a word. Sliding into my seat, I pulled out my notebook and began to doodle to calm myself.

Art had always been a way to calm my crazy thoughts and impulses ever since I was little. Bella had been the writer while I lost myself in crayons and later oil paints.

By the time the rest of the class started to filter in my panic attack had dissipated and I felt mentally okay enough to deal with Edward.

He sat down next to me and nervously intertwined our hands.

"How are you feeling?"

"Better. Thank you for giving me space."

"You're welcome." Raising my hand to his lips, he kissed my knuckles. "If you do not want to go to the principle then I will respect your wishes."

"Thank you-"

"But I would feel much better if you allowed me to walk you to all of your classes."

"We have a totally different schedule, though. How would that work?"

"Leave it to me, my love."

He kissed my knuckles again as the bell rang and then let our hands lay on his thigh and out of the view of Mr. Banner. The bell rang, and the lesson commenced. But all I could focus on was how cold he was and how lucky I was to be holding his hand.

* * *

 

"Do you want to go to dinner with me tonight?" Edward asked as we buckled our seatbelts.

"Another date?"

"Yes, but something lowkey. How about the diner?"

"Sounds great. I'd be delighted to go with you." I leaned over and kissed him, which turned into something more. When we pulled apart, he put the car into drive and we sped back to mine.

We worked on homework and then decided to leave for the diner. I drove my truck with Edward's hand on my thigh, half sweating and half melting.

We quickly sat and ordered, and when our food came the words popped out of his mouth.

"You are a very good artist," He exclaimed as he nibbled at a piece of toast, his nose wrinkling in distaste.

"It's just something I do to cope."

"Can you draw me?"

"Uh, uh- what?" The scene from Titanic filtered into my mind and I felt my face grow hot.

"Can you draw me?"

"I-yeah. I can do that."

"You are not obligated to just because we are together."

"No! It's just- I kind of thought of that scene in Titanic where Jack draws Rose naked and my mind went south." This time it was his turn to look embarrassed.

"Oh, yes. Well, if you would like to I could-" All of the saliva in my mouth? Gone. My hands? Sweaty as hell. My appetite? Nonexistent.

"You can't say stuff like that to me."

"Do you not like it?"

"No! No, I do. But now that's all I can think about." Sitting my fork down, I ran a hand over my face.

"You want to take this to go?"

"You read my mind."

The truck bounced with the force as his lips found mine and his arms pinned me to the truck seat. We had drove to our destination in the seclusion of the forest. Under the canopy of trees, Edward's cold touch was the only thing I could think of. Dad would be home by now and we couldn't exactly do this with him in the house.

As I felt his hardness grind into mine, I moaned and said, "How far do you want to go?"

"Why would we go farther than this?" He whispered against my collarbone. I giggled as his tongue tickled my skin.

"It wouldn't the first time that I had slept with someone so fast." In a flash he had pulled away from me and sat up on his knees, eyes wide. "What is it?"

"You're not a virgin?"

"No. Is that a problem?"

"How many?"

"Why does it matter?"

"Please, just answer the question."

"Five. Why, what's the problem?" Edward's face was unreadable, and the mood was sufficiently killed. Leaning up, I went to grab his hand, but he pulled away. "Edward?"

"Why wouldn't you save yourself?"

"Are you seriously slut shaming me right now?" It felt like a slap in the face.

"No, of course not-"

"Maybe I didn't save myself because I didn't want to. Sex isn't a bad thing, Edward. It's healthy and I connected with some beautiful people and I don't regret that."

Edward sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "I wish you would have told me this before."

"Before what? You kissed someone tainted?" When he kept quiet, I scoffed. "I guess you should have told me you were an asshole before you kissed me."

_See? You're not good enough for him. You're trash. Tainted._

"Brandon, that isn't what I meant-"

"Fuck you! How dare you talk to me like this. We've only been dating a day. Who are you to judge me when you barely know me?"

"I'm sorry." I felt so angry I couldn't think straight.

"Forget it. Let's just head back." As I went to turn on the truck he placed his hand on mine.

"No, we need to talk about this."

"What is there to talk about?"

"I never thought you were tainted. I just presumed that-"

"That because I'm an awkward geek I never fucked anyone?"

"Can you please refrain from that type of language? And no, I just didn't think you were the type-"

"The type? A slut?" I chuckled emotionlessly before sitting right in my seat and buckling my seatbelt. "I see where we stand. This has been fun, I guess. Two days together were great."

"That came out wrong."

"It always does."

"Brandon, I am a virgin and did not expect you not to be one."

"Okay."

"I felt insecure because you had been with other people. And I've never even had a partner."

I whipped my head around and stared at him with wide eyes, "Not at all?"

"No."

"But you're so-"

"Now who is making assumptions? I may be attractive, but I've never dated anyone. Sure, I've had crushed. But you were the first person I decided to start a relationship with."

"So, you don't think I'm a slut?"

"No, I don't." His lips press to mine, and I sigh, my tense body relaxing. He had such a weird effect on me.

Pulling away, I lean my forehead against his, "I'm sorry for calling you an asshole."

"And I am sorry for not telling you how I felt."

"We're quite a pair, aren't we?" "We'll get through things as long as we are together." I nodded and yawned as I felt exhaustion started to settle in.

What a day. Coming out, getting the snot beat out of me, fighting with Edward. All I wanted to do was crawl into bed and pass out.

"You tired, baby?" Edward asked, and my stomach fluttered.

_Baby?_

"Mhm."

"Why don't you let me drive us back?"

"Sure, okay. Sounds like a plan to me."

Like a sack of potatoes, I flung myself to the other side of the truck before fastening my seatbelt. Edward opened the driver's side and slipped inside before turning on the truck.

I was in and out most of the ride but once we parked, I slipped out and pulled him for a few soft kisses before saying goodbye.

I grunted at dad in greeting and then quickly got ready for bed.

That night I dreamt of Edward's smile. And I fell more and more for him.


	3. Just a Bite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> edward's 'eating habits' come to attention. and edward is also a dumbass.

"Maybe he wasn't hungry?" Eric said as he bites into his celery. I groan in irritation and shake my head.

"No, you don't understand. I've only seen him eat once and it was a bite of toast and then he gave me his leftovers to eat saying he wouldn't need them!"

"Isn't his mom a wicked chef, though? I heard she made this taco casserole for Jessica's mom and it was to die for. I bet he just ate when he got home."

"He didn't eat lunch and barely eats dinner with me? And then he goes home by what, ten pm? No one goes without eating like that unless something is wrong."

"Perhaps he has a feeding tube no one knows about?"

"Nope, that's not it."

"And you would know this how?" He raised a brow at me and I shrug while trying to look innocent. "Huh, didn't think you'd have it in ya… anyways, I'm sure he is fine, Brandon. Just relax, okay?"

"I can't relax, you just don't get it."

"Why is this worrying you so much?"

"No reason." Fuck, no. I didn't want to talk about this right now. At least not like this.

"Brandon, buddy. It's okay. You don't have to talk about it."

"Thank you…" Eric pulled me into a tight hug, my head on his chest and his hand patting my face. I giggled.

"You know you're my best friend, right? Foreverrrrrr."

"I'm so lucky, aren't I?"

"Damn right, you are."

"Mind if I steal my boyfriend for a second?" Eric and I turned to see Edward peering down at us with an amused expression. I started to pull away but Eric held on tighter.

"You be good to my boy, Cullen. Or I'll skin ya alive."

"I promise to be the perfect partner to him."

"Yuck, perfect? Just be genuine, okay?"

"Eric lemme go."

"I'll be genuine. Now can I steal him away?"

"Sure, okay," When Eric let go, I quickly stood up and wrapped my arms tightly around his frame, leaning my face against his chest. His clothes smelt expensive.

Edward led me away with an arm wrapped around my shoulder, his touch feeling almost colder than it usually did. We made our way to his locker in record time, and I peered in at the contents as he shuffled his books around. Taped to the door were a few pictures of he and his family; one of he and his brother Emmett and sister Alice giving peace signs at the camera, and one of he and his twin brother and sister Rosalie and Jasper sitting eating ice cream.

"What's your favorite food, Edward?" His body went rigid as he picked up his Biology textbook.

"Why do you ask?"

"Just wondering…"

"Pizza, I guess."

We have the same favorite food!

"Do you have a favorite pizza place then? Dominos, Pizza Hut?"

Please say Papa Johns, please say Papa Johns.

But it was not to be as he said, "Do they not all taste the same?"

"I can't believe you just said that…"

"What?"

"They all taste the same? As if!" His eyes widened comically as I went off on my tangent. "Edward, Dominos has the most flavorful crust! Papa Johns is my favorite because I love a lot of sauce, but Pizza Hut is good too. They have so many sides you can add too."

"You sure love pizza."

"Don't you?"

"H-ha, yeah. Of course, I do."

"Then what's your favorite place?"

"Papa Johns."

"I think you're lying."

"I am just not really a fan of food, love. Can we drop it?" I want to press the issue, but the look in his eyes tells me it isn't the time.

"Y-yeah. Sorry, I just get really passionate about things I love."

"And that is something I admire about you," Edward said gingerly before kissing my nose. "Come on, let's head to your locker and go to class early. I want to watch you draw some more."

"Lead the way, baby."

The rest of the school day went by as usual, but my mind kept coming back to Edward's weird eating habits.

As I lay in bed that night my head was swimming. The asshole depression was hitting me pretty hard and everything in me ached.

Did he have a problem? Was I overthinking it? Was I just pushing my own mental issues onto him?

In frustration, I screamed into my pillow before rolling over and attempting to go to sleep. I didn't get much sleep that night.

* * *

 

After school the next day I found myself at my third appointment with my counselor. When I moved to Forks, dad made sure I got all the care I needed, whether it be physically or mentally.

"How have you been these past few weeks, Brandon?" Doctor Uley asked with a smile and I sighed.

"I've been okay. I well," blush coated my cheeks. "I started dating this guy. We came out to the school and I sort of got hurt."

"Hurt?"

"Some kids cornered me before lunch and beat me up in the bathroom. I'm fine, though."

"Have there been any more instances?"

"No. Edward hasn't really let me out of his sight."

"Edward, is that your boyfriend?"

"Yeah, he's great. We got into a few arguments already, but it feels solid."

"What did you fight about?"

"I've been intimate, and he hasn't. And then he wanted me to report the bathroom attack, but I refused. After we both took some time to cool down, he told me he would support me but he wanted to walk me to and from class from now on." She smiled, writing on her clipboard at a fast pace.

"He seems like a nice young man."

"He is. I really like him."

"He seems to really like you too. Anything else happened?"

"Those guys stopped picking on me at lunch. I guess they don't think I'm a threat anymore?"

"That's good."

"My head has been a mess about something, though. Can you keep a secret?"

"You have my complete confidentiality."

"Edward doesn't eat. At least in front of me. I've seen his siblings eat during lunch, but I've only seen him nibble a piece of toast and that's it."

"He doesn't eat at all?"

"Not at school or when we hang out. And then he goes home very late. That is a long time to go without eating."

"That is a long time. Have you asked him about it?"

"He told me he doesn't really like food. But I'm just so worried that he's going to end up like me."

Doctor Uley patted me knee sympathetically. "I know you have struggled with your problems and I know you are worried about your boyfriend, but-"

"But?" "Edward may only eat small portions or even have a special diet due to health reasons that he has to follow."

I nodded, taking in the information, "I didn't think of the diet thing."

"You should talk to him about this and if you are still worried you could talk to his parents. I'm sure they would get him the help he needs if he does have a problem."

"Thank you, I will do that." "Ah, it looks like our session is up. Same time in two weeks?"

"Of course," I smiled, and she smiled back. "Thank you for listening."

"It was my pleasure, Brandon."

After making another appointment with the receptionist I left and made my way to my truck. And Edward was leaning against it.

"There you are," He said in a haggard breath before enveloping me into a hug. "What are you doing here?"

"I should be asking you that question."

"You didn't text me back. I got worried."

"So, you followed me?"

"Yes, but I wanted to make sure you were alright." The wind whipped around us but my face felt red hot.

"I can take care of myself, Edward."

"Like you did with those jerks that jumped you?"

My mouth dropped at his harsh tone, "Excuse me?"

"You got hurt. I couldn't forgive myself if you got hurt."

"This isn't the first time something like this has happened."

"Which makes it worse! Is this the reason you have an appointment here?" Giving him an incredulous look, I snorted before pushing him to the side and attempting to open the door. His hand grabbed my wrist and stopped me. "Brandon-"

"You don't know anything about me."

"I know you get yourself into a lot of trouble."

It burned as I thought of Gregory and how he fucked me over in Phoenix. And in more ways than one.

"Get your hands off me," I muttered in a small voice and my chest becomes tight. "Let go of me."

Fortunately, he did and I quickly got into my truck and pulled away, not giving Edward a second glance.

No, this was supposed to be different! Right?

But no, I guess not. I fell too fast like I always seemed to do. Let people fuck with my head and then what? Control me and make me feel worthless. Like everything is my fault.

No. Fuck no! I am not dealing with another asshole!

Edward will have to shape up or ship out. I will not be stalked, I will not be controlled, I will not be made to feel inferior.

Never again.

* * *

 

"Go away, Edward. I don't want to speak to you."

"I am sorry for following you. It was wrong of me."

"Yes, it was."

"But you were hurt on my behalf and I did not want another recurrence-"

"I am capable of taking care of myself, Edward. Believe me."

"I want to."

"Then do it," I shut my locker and faced him fully. "Because I will not deal with being stalked and controlled. I am seventeen-years-old, not seven."

My empty hands trembled, and I fought the urge to just dip out and head to lunch. But I stood my ground, looking straight into his golden-brown eyes with a clenched jaw.

Edward slowly grabbed both of my hands and intertwined our fingers before kissing both of my knuckles.

"I will not stalk you again or control you in any way. I am so sorry," His cold lips pressed to my forehead and then my nose. "There is no excuse for my actions. I will be a better partner to you. I promise."

"Don't make promises you can't keep."

"I promise I won't." Our lips met, and I felt myself melt.

I wouldn't trust him, not yet. No, he would work on that. But I would stay with him and work it through our problems. And we would. I just knew it.

We walked to lunch hand and hand and sat down at my usual table. Edward picked at his tray but again, did not eat.

My nerves ate at me.

_I have no idea what to do._


End file.
